I have had several incredible moments on this pilgrimage – many of which I’ve tried to capture through this blog. At least 3 different times, I felt my emotions grabbing me and throttling me all over the place. Today has been the dearest to me, but it was not just because of what I saw and experienced. It was because I mixed these moments with a great deal of worry for my home.
We started this morning with a quick drive to the Dung Gate of the walls of the Old City. When you enter parts of the Old City you must pass through security checkpoints. I was in the rear with our director of ministerial services (Kevin Burney) and as I stepped through the scanner it beeped. I stepped back and emptied my pockets. It beeped again. I took off my belt. It beeped again. I took off my name tag and passport pack. It beeped again. Needless to say, I was mildly nervous and I think even the Israeli soldier sensed it. I had nothing left on my body save my clothing and wedding ring! He patted me down, smiled and said I was okay (his supervisor behind him was still not smiling). I grabbed my things and hurriedly tried to catch up with the group as they raced on toward the Wailing Wall. My heart was beating a million miles a second as I walked while redressing in the site of the dome of the Rock.
As we emerged from the tunnel, I found myself standing on the Temple Mount – wow. I could see the beautiful Mosque as well as many devout followers reading and praying from their Quran. We walked up the base and our guide told us something I didn’t know – contrary to popular thought, it is believed that the Dome does not sit on the same place as the Holy of Holies was. Archeologists believe that it is further west of the dome. A small pavilion accidentally marks the site that it is believed stood the very Holy of Holies. As I stood there, though still nervous, I began to feel my body relax.
From there we marched down the steps to the Eastern Gate and then to the pool of Bethsaida, where Jesus healed the man who couldn’t make it to the stirred water. Then it was on to the remains of the Fortress of Antonia. This impressive structure was home to the Roman military muscle in Jerusalem. It was high enough to peer into the temple and maintain some sense of watchful eye. It was here that Pilate tried Jesus. It is here that the Via Delorosa and the stations of the cross begins.
The stations are in the middle of life. They are not for those seeking a meditative time of quiet and reflection. You have to watch where you walk and where you area going nonstop. It is a ridiculous ascent up to Golgotha. Walking it is difficult enough so carrying a cross while already having been scourged is an unbelievable thought.
The way leads you to the Church of the Holy Seplurchre and both the rock called Cavalry and the tomb. I was able to stick my hand into the hole that is the traditional site of where the cross was dropped. I placed my hand on the marble that now protects the stone slab where they laid his body. Thanks be to God, the tomb is still empty!!
After the tomb visit it was through a second security check point – this time I passed! I could finally breathe. Then it was to see the Wall. I had anticipated going to the wall after lunch, so I didn’t have my prayers with me. For generations, the faithful have come and prayed at this wall that God would come again and restore His home on earth. People write prayers and cram them into cracks. I had no paper. I ravaged my wallet and found 1 thing that I could use – my business card. It’s perfect – it has my name which would represent me, my wife, kids and all my extended family (whether they are a Nichols or not). It has my church, so my coworkers and home congregation were counted. It has my denomination so our leaders and the church was mentioned. It had all of who I am – my past, present and future all written on one little piece of paper.
I donned a kippa, ceremonially washed my hands and walked to the wall. I put my hands and my head against that wall and the immensity of the moment hit me. Even now, I feel it. I prayed and would still be there if there wasn’t someone yelling at me. As I prayed it began to rain on my head. I rolled up my card as tight as I could and crammed it into whatever hole I could find. The moment was more than I ever imagined.
After this, we drove for lunch. This is where my day started to press in on me. Joy texted me and told me of the tornado warnings in Louisville. I panicked. I couldn’t do a thing. They were huddled in a hallway and I was thousands of miles away. We texted back and forth (thank God for wifi and Apple’s iMessage system) until the storm passed. I had just prayed for them but I can’t tell you how badly I wanted to hold them all. My children talked and my wife held things together (including me now that I think of it). I received pictures of the cat and one dog, but that was enough. I texted Joy and my boys and told them of my love. Then after the storm they went back to try and get some rest.
After lunch, we went to the tomb of Lazarus. I walked down the steep steps thinking of my family. As I crawled into the hole that he had been laid in, a muslim funeral process over my head. The contrast was striking. While I was out of wifi reach, Alex and Tyler texted me their replies. When I got to the bus and opened my phone I had words of love and their missing daddy. As I reflected on the day and the moment, tears rolled down my face. I realized something – this maybe the Holy Land, and it surely is amazing, but there is something holy back at home too.
May you find that moment today – tired as you and I may be – to know that you are in Abba’s arms. That your daddy loves YOU. That the Savior is the Way, the Truth and the Life – the Resurrection. May you know that the tomb is empty! May you know His LOVE!
Shalom for now…
Jim
